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Fill in the blank on Obamacare's "mom jeans" ad to help it tell the truth

I filled in the top half of this ad earlier (you can see the original here)...iOwnTheWorld is looking to completely rewrite it, join in that fun here.

I've got a different angle, I want to fill in the blank. Instead of "health insurance" at the end I think everything we're really getting should go in.

Like with my liberal propaganda smackdowns, in the next day or so I want to add THE TRUTH to this add and then release it back into the wild.

So help me out! What goes in the blank?