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Conservative Satire News February 10, 2011

After postulating a possible run for president Donald Trump praises Ron Paul as a "good guy" but has "zero chance" to actually be elected president without a cool, huge comb over.

Donning fake glasses and taking an oddly serious tone, Biden speculates that Mubarak may actually be physically unable to actually "step aside" as Egypt's president because his advanced age may have caused him to forget how to "walk like an Egyptian."

The Director of National Intelligence issues a shocking statement admonishing people to know that the Muslim Brotherhood is a largely secular organization relative the Tea Party, or people who believe in global warming.