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Conservative Satire Headlines November 3, 2010

New GOP majority assures humbled Obama that their decision to just "not compromise" is, in fact, a compromise.

Obama insists the election was not a repudiation of his agenda itself, just what it is doing to the country.

San Francisco justifies ban of McDonald's Happy Meals citing the only thing that should be bad for children is their politics.

Florida voters punish family of Alan Grayson by sending him home.

Election sees Barney Frank escape being left behind, goes back to indulging in left behind.

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The First Day Of The Rest of Conservatism's Life

The 2010 election is a huge step in the right direction, but we need to remember that this needs to be the first election where we win the battle and then we don't go home when its over, ever again.

We have to hold people who accept the label of conservative accountable, because the last two years is what we get when bad Republicans make the body politic so sick to its stomach that they make exlax look like Halloween candy.

Honest conservatives have known since November 5, 2008 that this wasn't going to end well for the Democrats. They knew this wasn't an affirmation of crazy liberal policies, but a rejection of the people who were entrusted to carry the torch of real American values who kept pissing on the torch and calling it rain.

"People out there are still hurting very badly, and they are still scared. And so part of the reason that our politics seems so tough right now, and facts and science and argument does not seem to be winning the day all the time, is because we're hard-wired not to always think clearly when we're scared," Obama said at a Democratic fundraiser Saturday in Boston. "And the country is scared, and they have good reason to be."

From Fox News

The preceding message was sponsored by the corporation for NEVER LETTING A CRISIS GO TO WASTE.

Which is a better instance of voters "not thinking" clearly? Voting to give power to the party that wants to repeal a health care takeover they never wanted, or "you know what, Vice President Biden has a nice ring to it."

College girls 10 tequila shots deep and using absinthe as a chaser at a fraternity party titled "Lets Have An Orgy" make more responsible decisions than the throngs of ZOMBIES wetting their panties over a man who, as they are just now realizing, has less substance than a hollowed out cheese puff.



November 3, 2010 needs to go as the first day of the rest of American conservatism's long, and hopefully immortal life.

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I May Have To Disown California

When will they learn?!?



Click the image to see the full size.

This also reminds me of "re-electing Jerry Brown again,"<--click this to see what I mean (the link is sort of buggy, so if it doesn't work try it until it does)

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Congratulations California For Electing Jerry Brown!!!

If there was any year that the GOP could make something happen in California it was this one. That state is officially lost...at least we know for sure now.



Click the image to see the full size.

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Boehner Tries To Help Pelosi Feel A Little Better


From Pelosi cold dead fingers


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I Think This Is A Good Way To Describe Election Night...

We didn't get everything we wanted...but election night was a damn good night for the right in the USA...


Democrats defeated


I really wanted to get Reid though...I'm really bummed about that one.

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An Open Letter To The President

Dear President Obama,

CAN YOU HEAR US NOW!


Sincerely,

America

Sorry for the shouting, but I have to because to him it sounds like...

CAN YOU HEAR US NOW!

When he listens to us like...


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Conservative Satire Headlines November 2, 2010

Pelosi defiantly proclaims she will be happy with tonight election results even if she has to chisel it onto her face.

Biden campaigns for Delaware Senate race, gets voters to chant "YES WE CAN" every time he says "TAKE ME BACK!"

Day after San Francisco Giants win World Series nation tells Pelosi that in Congress she no longer is one.

Feeling sorry for the President Obama, thousands attempt to make him feel wanted by writing him in for their village's idiot.

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If You Have No Other Reason To Vote Here Is The Ultimate One...

I'm bringing this post from last week back because IT'S ELECTION DAY! So get out there and...


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Random Thoughts On Election Day

I'm here for the Restoring Sanity rally! No, I'm NOT 3 days late.

I hereby declare this election day Operation: Kick Dem Asses!

Obama thinks Republican's should sit in the back of the bus..I understand why, I just think its weird they would put the steering wheel back there.

Schumer is getting ready to replace Leader Reid...altogether now....WHATS UP CHUCK! Wait, thats not right.......oh yeah, its LETS UPCHUCK!

Will Pelosi's tears dissolve her tissue?

Looking for help from up above?



Maybe he'll see the light tomorrow...


If a Democrat falls in the Congress and nobody is there to hear it, does Hillary still cackle like a cat in a blender?

Will Barney Frank finally be left behind, or will he win and get some celebratory left behind?

Did you know the parking lot where I parked to vote is not just home to registered Democrats, it is one too?!?

Harry Reid is right, Obama is like the miners....before the cave in.

Looks like Nevada is about to bet it all on a different kind of red than what they've been getting with the Dems.

Only because I want the Senate too...Go McCain.

Christine O'Donnell is a good witch, Pelosi is a bad witch, and Osama bin Laden is a sand-witch. (h/t to the great John Pinette on the inspiration for that one)

I hope Al Franken is watching the returns for Dems so he can finally see what a joke really is.

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