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More Reasons People Should Be A Democrat

A continuation of a post I did about Reasons People Should Be a Democrat. I found a few that the College Democrats missed....

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I'm a Democrat because conservatives think God created man and as an artist I resent the competition.

I'm a Democrat because I like being the cause of an Obamanation.

I'm a Democrat because is Karl Marx is an intellectual immigrant who resides in my brain.

I'm a Democrat because I want to stop global warming so Obamanable Snowmen don't go extinct.

I'm a Democrat because hope is a four-letter word.

I'm a Democrat because bureaucratic inefficiency is a terrible thing to waste.

I'm a Democrat because toilet paper use should be limited to one square, even if we liberals need an entire roll sometimes.

I'm a Democrat because emo kids need a hero.

I'm a Democrat because the Toyota Prius needs a market.

I'm a Democrat because I believe the ACLU needs to ally itself with an organization less scandalous than NAMBLA, and we're the right men women people creatures women for the job.

I'm a Democrat because money isn't going to confiscate itself.

I'm a Democrat because I don't think debt is a four-letter word.

I'm a Democrat because of the party's clarity on how the right to marry should be extended to anyone who loves anyone, except polygamists, or small children, or most animals.

I'm a Democrat because fur is murder, and a human fetus doesn't have that, so viva Planned Parenthood!

I'm a Democrat because everyone with a gun should be a criminal, and cops are pigs.

I'm a Democrat because the Constitution is a living document and should be treated as such....and by our calculations it would probably be undeserving of care under the healthcare system we want to have.