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Top 10 Reasons to Make Donald Trump President

I can't leave this freakin' guy alone, but neither can anyone else right now. I'll tell you what, if this guy doesn't run it will be the most brilliant way to promote the finale of The Apprentice (when he is supposedly making his decision) ever..

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10. Hail to the Chief can be replaced with The Apprentice theme song.

9. It's the ultimate lesser of two evils: The entrepreneur who once bankrupted his company vs. the world citizen who bankrupted his the country.

8. Melania Trump could be the first First Lady ever to champion the cause of raising "taxes" to "strengthen" our "bottom line."

7. He'll shrink the government with weekly Cabinet meetings in the boardroom, televised with ads, where a department will be fired.

6. Any news story that involves Ivanka Trump by any news source will have to be referred to as Fox News.

5. The country will upgrade from a president who is a golfaholic to the guy who owns the courses.

4. No more bowing to foreign leaders, because it's too risky with a combover.

3. Nothing tells the world America is back better than a gold plated Air Force One.

2. A President Trump could do the job for free, saving the country at least $1.6 million, AKA the maximum Democrats will cut from the deficit.

1. He wont take a running mate so when he beats Obama he'll make him Vice President and call him The Apprentice.