I'll give you one guess as to what some "scientists" think caused the tsunami in Japan...you'll only need one.
If you're REALLY stumped go here...or read the quote below from Grist.org.
Melting ice masses change the pressures on the underlying earth, which can lead to earthquakes and tsunamis, but that's just the beginning.
Global warming again?!? No #$%&ing way!
Great, let me cut to the "end" where we remember that in the last two years the world has experienced record cold and blizzards. So unless "science" has study about the passive aggressive disposition of mother nature, I don't think "melting ice" caused the earth's crust to pop like a trampoline in this case.
For some time now global warming has been shifting from a real "problem" into a taking on a role more akin to something else...
Anytime there is a happening in the world that isn't easily or conclusively explained all scientists have to do is whip out the roll of global warming, tear off a piece and slap on the problem.
BAM! Issue resolved.
I should develop a game called "Six Degrees of Global Warming."Add a comment
This is an email that was sent to me recently, I actually chose to rewrite it a bit...----------
This is a very sad story about a bear.
It begins with this admonition: Everybody should heed the warnings to not feed wildlife, because they become dependent on the humans feeding them. Eventually, they find they cannot forage for themselves anymore because they have forgotten how!
This has become a real tragedy for our country's wildlife! The photo below captures a disturbing trend that is beginning to affect some of the more dependent animals...
Animals that were formerly self-sufficient are now showing symptoms of what some doctors are calling Lazius Democraticus, due to the fact they have apparently learned to just sit on their ass and wait for someone to step in and provide for their care and sustenance.
This photo is of a "Democrat" black bear in Montana the locals have nicknamed Bearack Obearma.Add a comment
Some liberal, E.D. Kain, over at Forbes has posed the question of whether the public union fight in Wisconsin will be the GOP Waterloo.
And not just Wisconsin, but also Indiana, Michigan, Ohio, Arizona, Florida, and the rest of the over-reaching state Republicans. Governors like Scott Walker, Rick Scott, and Jan Brewer are riding on the coattails of the Tea Party, but they've become blind to the dangers of their radical policies.
First of all, there isn't a Waterloo without a Napoleon to lead us there. I know there are a lot of mental midgets on the left, but we need a physical one, so liberals would need to loan us Robert Reich, George Stephanopolus.
Second we need to rewrite the rules of math to ensure that even though self-described conservatives outnumber liberals by 2 to 1, they're the ones who live outside the mainstream.
Third, all this talk about Republican Waterloos is wishful thinking, fearmongering, or both....and it's making me disturbingly thirsty for British toilet water
Basically, what we have here is Kain employing what I call the third leg of a liberal argument tripod. There's name calling, and then there's moral equivocation. Finally, what we're seeing here is the appearance of isolation.
Liberals try to make anyone who doesn't believe leftist opinions infallibly shape reality as we all know it feel like they are the only ones who see it that way.
The names Kain dropped are radicals only because he has an argument to win and a public conscious to contaminate.
Jan Brewer signed SB 1070, which pursued the blindingly "radical" policy to eject illegal immigrants from the country. Illegal immigrant supporters swore she would pay at the polls because crossing them was a "dangerous" policy.
Brewer sailed to election 55% to the Democrats 42%....sailed....in the desert.
To be sure, Wisconsin is a much different state. If the GOP is willing to make their case then public unions will find that those of us in the private sector, who have had to take a financial haircut in our own lives over the last few years, will have little sympathy for the simultaneous sense of entitlement and avoidance of sacrifice by these public leeches.
Sure, polls show support for recall of at least 2 GOP senators, but thats because one side is really heated up and the GOP, unlike the Democrats, has been largely absent from the PR fight because they've been to busy NOT being absent from the state capitol...unlike the Democrats.
The Recallistas have forgotten that the GOP wont walk away from the fight once Walker signs the bill. That's when the Koch brothers waltz in on wearing George Soros masks (they're so tired/high they'll think they're seeing double) and riding a big white Trojan horse, amid the throngs of thousands of liberal union hippies who think their special election sugar daddy has arrived.
They'll toss flowers in adulation...pulled from the capitol building gardens. They'll offer up the children they're protesting for in sacrifice. Then, the really randy ones will even toss their dirty, browned, protest-fatigued panties, because liberal billionaire rockstars like "George Soros" deserve nothing less than their absolute best.
That's when the trap door in the horse's ass opens up and money just flows from it like Michael Moore after dining on cheap street fish tacos (extra mayo) shipped in an iceless cooler from Milwaukee.
Anyone who doesn't believe in the power of Koch will be washed away by the flow of their money. It will be glorious, because money in politics wins again...and the protesters finally get bathed in something.
The rub is if the recall elections are funded the same way as last years election only .5% of that money will actually belong to the Koch's, just enough to pay for the construction of the horse. I couldn't tell you where the other 99.5% of it comes from because liberals don't hate those guys enough.Add a comment
The GOP in Wisconsin totally stole second base when the Dems weren't looking. Who knew a few tweeks to the verbiage and you've got one of those knockout blows that you see coming but are so stunned before hand that your opponent managed it that all you can do is just watch in awe at it's collision course with your face.
Sorry libs, you've been had.
The question now lies in where to go from here, since I've only witnessed liberal temper tantrums I'll do my best to outline their options.
Protest harder - They didn't bang their bongos enough. I know I would be willing to do anything to make that stop after 3 weeks straight, which requires no sleep, which requires giving up the pot for a while. Which, while we're at it should be .
Hold a concert - Remember that one they did in the 90's to free Tibet? How about Live Earth from a few years ago? If you want something to overshadow the unmitigated narcissism of public union leftists nothing does it better than a rock star with a cause.
Cry - News of their plight will reach the world a lot faster of the mainstream media didn't have to take the time to photoshop tears.
Use permanent ink - I don't know, maybe this is already being done, but I feel that drawing Hitler moustaches on Scott Walker shows a commitment to the message.
Call in the big guns - I know you're thinking Michael Moore was just there, I said big guns, not big 'uns. Air Force One needs to do a fly over and parachute in the teleprompters
Recall election: They're actually going through with this one. I'll bet some rich liberal is helping bankroll it. I wonder if the pile of money they're going to get will be so huge they won't be able to see the Koch's anymore. They better make sure they make the check out to "Green with envy hypocrites," which makes for a bad fake name...so how about "Soros's Children" instead?
Go back to work - I got laid off TWICE in six months during this recession! I took my lumps...at least you ingrates will still have YOUR jobs! Maybe if I was responsible for putting MY boss in charge I could've DEMANDED and received raises and benefits while my company teetered on the brink of bankruptcy.
What am I saying? Someone get these teabags off of my eyes, I'm clearly not seeing things realistically. Quick show me some kids frowning.Add a comment
Last month I did a piece called The "Progressive" Fight To Save "The Force" In Wisconsin, and a follower on Twitter read it and made a comment that sort of inspired this.
Liberals shouldn't get TOO upset about this one.Add a comment
The ability to morally equivocate has got to be the greatest mental gymnastics trick the left has in it's arsenal of "intellectual arguments." If something is indefensible all they have to do is point out something else that is indefensible, and then they don't ever have to think about how evil is always the ONLY one peeing in your coffee.
It's pretty awesome, especially if you get pulled over by a liberal cop...you can talk your way out of a speeding ticket by reminding him that HE broke the speed limit to pull you over.
In the last generation Muslim extremism has gone nuclear, and now one guy wants to have a conversation about it, but liberals don't want to hear it...
For Representative Peter T. King, as he seizes the national spotlight this week with a hearing on the radicalization of American Muslims, it is the most awkward of résumé entries. Long before he became an outspoken voice in Congress about the threat from terrorism, he was a fervent supporter of a terrorist group, the Irish Republican Army.
More at The New York Times
When I was in college there was a popular game we played on the network in my dorms called Counterstrike. There were two teams, terrorists and counter-terrorists, basically each team would duke it out while terrorists either tried to blow up something or prevent the counter-terrorists from rescuing their hostages.
Sometimes I played on the terrorist team. Also, when I was a teenager I used to say things that were cool were "da bomb." My wife has dried her hair by wrapping a towel around her head.
So I really can't criticize Muslim terrorists either.
What if King didn't support the IRA? What if a different congressman, with a reputation that's more clean than Michael Moore's dinner plate, called for the hearings? Would it be ok to talk about Muslim terrorism then?
What if we went with Biden's suggestion, which he uses when he wishes to remain anonymous, to not make it so obvious that we're talking about them by switching the first and last letters of "Muslim?"
When will the left figure out that hypocrisy makes a person a hypocrite, but it doesn't make them wrong? Making Peter King's wrong-headed support for the IRA the reason we shouldn't talk about murder in the name of Islam is idiotic on its face, to say nothing of it being no consolation to the victims of either one of them.
In fairness the Times article does acknowledge that there is a world of difference between Al Qaeda and the IRA, but then essentially concludes that difference is meaningless after an unfortunate typo involving some terrorist named O'Sama.Add a comment
If there was any wonder how truly $#$%ed we are when it comes to fixing our addiction to spending money Harry Reid answers that question once and for all...
“The mean-spirited bill, H.R. 1, eliminates National Public Broadcasting," said Reid in a floor speech. "It eliminates the National Endowment of the Humanities, National Endowment of the Arts. These programs create jobs. The National Endowment of the Humanities is the reason we have in northern Nevada every January a cowboy poetry festival. Had that program not been around, the tens of thousands of people who come there every year would not exist.”
More at Townhall
Not exist? Tens of thousands of people would apparently disappear if there wasn't taxpayer funded cowboy poetry? What happens? Would they become unborn? Is the GOP trying to abort cowboy poets?
Wait a sec, tens of thousands of people show up to this thing? Are any of them actual cowboys that write poetry, or is it like the benefits of ObamaCare and its all make believe characters in one of the poems?
This is hard to believe, I mean, President Obama can't even get 100 high schools to beg him for an appearance at their graduation ceremonies. 100 times more people gather to find out what rhymes with cowboy?
Here's an idea! Its a win win, Reid can still have his festival, and Republicans don't have to be the bad guys for nailing its coffin shut. Send Obama there to read some of the poems.
Boy wouldn't that be fun? We could place bets on what he would do to embarrass the country next...here's my prediction...
Add a comment
So apparently do their executives! Nothing makes a man sing better than a juicy five million dollar carrot being served as dessert I guess.
I'm relieved that NPR is appalled by recent comments caught on tape of Former Senior Executive Robert Schiller calling conservatives everything but Satan's barnacles. I would be appalled too if I got caught with my hand in the liberal bias fat free cookie jar.
Between what they did to Juan Williams and now this maybe liberals have a crush on Allah.
One thing is certain, NPR is not appalled about anything. They're embarrassed. Executives with five million dollar checks being dangled in front of their noses don't tow any line that wasn't handed to them at some point by someone higher up.
Which begs the question, other than a thorough butt sniffing from Robert Schiller what would Muslims get if they gave a REAL five million dollar check to NPR?
Whatever they want?
Another one knocked out of the park from YouTube user Battlefield315.