Follow Me on Pinterest

Liberal Mafia Nicknames

The criminal accusations spanned several states and several decades, encompassing figures from seven mob families, and led to the arrest of nearly 125 people on federal charges on Thursday.

There were murders, including a double homicide over a spilled drink in a Queens bar. There were the more run-of-the-mill activities associated with organized crime: racketeering, extortion, loan-sharking, money laundering, gambling and the like.

From The New York Times (h/t Memeorandum)

These guys apparently had some really colorful nicknames. Which got me thinking...what would be some good liberal mobster nicknames?

Michelle Obama aka "Fat-Free Candy A$$"

Eric Holder aka "Black Pantha Cracka Jacka"

Chuck Schumer aka "The Big A$$hole"

Charlie Rangel aka "The Slum-lard"

Al Sharpton aka "Reverend Clump"

Harry Reid aka "The Pink Taco Stand"

Nancy Pelosi aka "The Broomstick Jockey" "Grossie Pelosi," and "Ajar Face"

Joy Behar aka "Rude Dude" and "Mama Crass"

Janet Napolitano "The Al Qaeda Diamond" aka "Right-Wing Blame Gamer"

Al Gore aka "CFC" aka "Climate Fire Crotch"

Hillary Clinton aka "Shrill Pill"

Bill Clinton aka "Dress Messer"

Barney Frank aka "Dong Bonger"

Michael Moore aka "King Hippo," "Flabba Jaba the Hut," "Wide Shot" and "The Lens Crap"

Bill Maher aka "The Atheist Nose God"

Helen Thomas aka "Mama Maher," and "Prescription Beer Goggles"

Joe Biden aka "The Scholar," "The Brain Dust," and "Gaffey Taffy"

John Edwards aka "Johnny Crappleseed"

Barack Hussein Obama aka "Hope Dope Smoker," "Teleprompter Romper," and "The Marxman"

So, what did I miss?

Add a comment

A Government Work Simulator

I don't know how it was done, but there's a website that was engineered to provide a two minute window into the work day of a government bureaucrat. If you mess up, it makes you start over until you get it right. Check it out here

Add a comment

The President Opens Up on Health Care

Add a comment

Conservative Satire Headlines January 20, 2011

Democrats complain the proposal to cut spending by 2.5 trillion in 10 years is yet another reckless GOP scheme to undo the hard work of the last 4 years.

Biden attempts to confirm media speculation that political winds are changing at press conference announcing his farts haven't smelled for weeks.

Michelle Obama retires Let's Move initiative, citing it is too much work for her taste, refocuses energy on proliferation of Spanx.

Add a comment

The Constitution's "Pursuit of Happiness" Clause

CNS News quotes Democratic Congressman from Georgia, John Lewis...

"Well, when you start off with the Preamble of the Constitution, you talk about the pursuit of happiness," said Lewis. "You go to the 14th Amendment--it's equal protection under the law and we have not repealed the 14th Amendment. People have a right to have health care. It's not a privilege but a right."

More here

Maybe he's right, if the pursuit of happiness is the burden we place on whether or not something should be a right then there are a few other things we should mandate as rights under the happiness clause....




A Harvard education

Cell phones

Video games

A date with Megan Fox

Free pizza when Michelle isn't looking

Forcing Biden's resignation

The View, starring Elisabeth Hasselbeck, and....that's it.

Banning the use of "reform," "progressive," "dollar," "America" and any other word liberals have ruined.

Wipe out the remainder of Chris Matthews's audience by hiring them to be cameramen for some other show

Legally changing Joy Behar's name, because she isn't one.

Abortion on demand if doctors can determine the fetus isn't actually alive, aka Larry King Syndrome

Allowing hardware stores having a broom purchased by Pelosi check for a valid pilot's license.

Not allowing Congress to convene until they win a round of Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader

Sarah Palin going green by liberals pushing her so hard she turns into the Hulk

Those would be a good start...

Wait a second, if the government forces me to have anything, am I actually pursuing or is it being forced down my throat. Maybe we should change the preamble of the Constitution, to make Congressman Lewis happy, to say "Life, Liberty and the guarantee to be Righteously Gagged."

The only obstacle to this change is the fact that " Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness" is in the Declaration of Independence.

Is this what Ezra Klein meant when he said the Constitution was hard to understand?

Add a comment

Michael Moore's Next Movie To Be On Paternity Test Accuracy...

Jaba the Hut is Michael Moore father

Awww look, he even has daddy's mannerisms...

Add a comment

Conservative Satire Headlines January 19, 2011

Democratic Congressman Steve Cohen compares GOP to Nazi's, adding the only thing missing is a cool, ubiquitous, Obama-esque logo.

GOP recklessly votes to repeal ObamaCare liberal protests that it's constitutional since it violates the "pursuit of happiness" promised in the Declaration of Independence.

Biden tells McCain that a retiring Joe Lieberman can't be considered for Secretary of Defense because he's never even been to the Mexican border.

Hawaii's governor expresses frustration that he can't find Obama's birth certificate, now understands how O.J. Simpson must have felt when searching for his wife's killer.

Add a comment

The GOP Are Nazi Liars, and I Mean That in the Most Civilized Way Possible

Check out this lecture in civility from Democratic Congressman Steve Cohen on health care.

I feel the same exact way about his party calling themselves "progressives."

I contended that Politifact calling this the biggest lie of 2010 is total nonsense last month, you can see it again here.

I also argued "ObamaCare Repeal Will Expand the Deficit Like Unicorns Will Go Extinct" here.

Add a comment

A State of the Union Preview

With less than a week to go experts have used computer modeling to project how it might go...

Add a comment

Obama's Gift to China's President

Biden Christmas Card

If it's tough to read you can click the image to see a larger version.

Add a comment