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Conservative Satire Headlines December 16, 2010

Bracing for Don't Ask Don't Tell repeal a new group, Gays for Armed-forces Remaining Straight Exclusive (Gays for ARSE), ask heterosexuals for advice on "legitimate" ways to say no to military recruiters.

Environmental groups announce new initiative to save trees by banning college diplomas after Washington DC area is found to contain the nation's most "educated."

Revelation from detained terrorists that Al Qaeda is planning attacks on Christmas triggers demand by the ACLU that the terrorist organization not steal their thunder.