So the FDA has created 36 new designs for warnings about the dangers of smoking that will cover the top half of cigarette packs. It's all WAY over the top, but they did get really creative with them.
I went ahead and picked out, for lack of a better word, the top 5 designs. Guess which one is my favorite. If you want, leave a comment on which one is yours :-)
In first move back to fiscal conservatism Boehner fly commercially so government can save money on having to disinfect Pelosi's private jet.
Democrats opposing Pelosi's run for minority leader stand accused of being traitors to liberalism's core principle of rewarding failure.
Working title of report from Obama debt reduction commission rumored to be, "Let Them Eat Cake So We Can Tax That Too."Add a comment
Last week I got Obama a little something for the two year anniversary of his election...
iOwnTheWorld shared it with their readers and encouraged well wishers to leave a message. Below are my favorites:
We already wished him well this past Nov. 2nd
For he’s a jolly good fellow,
His pant legs are turning yellow,
His spine is made out of Jell-O,
Which nobody can deny!
(But try, Chris Matthews!)
Which nobody can deny (join in, Katie Couric!), which nobody can deny (now Oprah!)
For he’s a socialist fellow, which the MSM denies.
Happy anniversary, Mr President and thank you We couldn’t have fatally discredited liberalism and the old media without you
Happy Anniversary, Barry! We got you a new Congress!
Happy halfway point of your last term, Comrade Zero.
I flushed TWICE, in hopes my Anniversary Present would reach him faster!
For huge egos.
For huge egos get bigger every day.
For huge egos.
They blow up in the most delightful way.
So fragile and now reeling
With all their cash
They’re in the trash
ObamaCare we’re repealing.
For huge egos.
Thank Heaven for them all
No matter where, no matter who
They pissed off all the voters
Now they’re screwed.
See the rest hereAdd a comment
Ted Rall is a liberal wiener who draws cartoons and practices trying to get through just one impression of Clint Eastwood in the mirror without pissing himself scared. Here is the tough guy in action
He sounds only semi-looney toons in the video, check out a passage from his new book "The Anti-American Manifesto."
Christian fundamentalists, the millennial end-of-theworlders obsessed with the Left Behind series about the End Times, neo-Nazi racists, rural black-helicopter Michigan Militia types cut from the same inbred cloth as Timothy McVeigh, allied with “mainstream” gun nuts and right-wing Republicans, have been planning, preparing, and praying for the destruction of the “Godless,” “secular” United States for decades. In the past, they formed groups like the John Birch Society and the Aryan Nations. Now the hard Right has a postmodern, decentralized non-organization organization called the Tea Party.
Right-wing organizational names change, but they amount to the same thing: the reactionary sociopolitical force—the sole force—poised to fill the vacuum when collapse occurs. The scenario outlined by Margaret Atwood’s prescient novel The Handmaid’s Tale—rednecks in the trenches, hard military men running things, minorities and liberals taken away and massacred, setting the stage for an even more extreme form of laissez-faire corporate capitalism than we’re suffering under today—is a fair guess of how a post-U.S. scenario will play out unless we prepare to turn it in another direction…
A war is coming. At stake: our lives, the planet, freedom, living. The government, the corporations, and the extreme right are prepared to coalesce into an Axis of Evil. Are you going to fight back? Will you do whatever it takes, including taking up arms?…
...Part of the revolution may be fought virtually by hackers. Those individuals are every bit as valauable as people who blow things up.
Here's a reality check for Oscar Meyer
Imagine in your mind this guy egging "revolutionaries" on to "blow things up" while he proposes himself to be the look out. Thank God this tool is just an Osama bin Laden with stage fright who only has a pair until the sharpie ink he used to draw them washes off his crotch.
I just hope the reality of my three points never changes.Add a comment
Pentagon assures nation missile fired off of California coast is no threat to national security, just California.
Speculation arises that missile fired over pacific is actually a post-election warning shot to California from God.
Gallup poll finds statistical tie between Obama and Bush, and that Bush actually wins among gay men who don't realize they're choosing the former-president.
While criticizing earmarks, Biden says they are ugly and people should stick to earrings.Add a comment
George W. Bush's book is out!
I want to take a few moments to address/answer some potential rumors and other details that didn't make the final cut:
There is a shortage of crayons, but only in NYC and San Francisco.
Biden did not ghost write the book, he tried to plagiarize it.
Kanye West is not expected to read it, he can barely read his own lyrics.
If Bush decides to appear on "The View" to discuss the book ABC is preparing for the eventuality of temporarily calling it "The Elizabeth Hasselbeck Hour."
His handlers did try to smooth things over by saying the "W" stood for Whoopi.
He did blow it by asking if her middle name was "Cushion."
The hole he dug got deeper when he said thats how she sounded to him.
There is a limited edition run that features a doodle by Bush of Al Gore in his private jet doing donuts over the ice caps.
The Iraq War chapter is NOT autographed by Saddam's old autopen.
The only member of the administration adamant that Pelosi would make a good speaker was the magic 8 ball.
Editors removed a passage where he told Obama that he would get history book to name the Bush tax cuts after him if he'd extend them.
Editors also killed effort in describing mementos from presidency to put quotes around his old Pelosi "mask."
Details about how happy a drunk Barney Frank can be have been left out because the president takes seriously what happens in Vegas.
During the Democratic primaries Hillary almost asked him to endorse Obama.
At one point there might have been a chapter detailing how Bill Clinton was so desperate to return to the White House he offered to switch parties to replace Cheney.
Also removed from the book was the episode where Reid first started calling himself a boxer after he lost a round of slap-boxing to Jenna.Add a comment
The Dems are concerned that they lost because their messaging stunk, so I want to help them make it clearer by suggesting slogans for Speaker Pelosi's grand demotion to minority leader should they choose to go off that cliff.
Her Words Will Be Forever Dung.
Leader Of The Whine and Sleaze Party
The Killah of Jobzillas
Head of the elected undead
From Top Gun To Top None
The Lie-onic Woman
Celebrate good crimes COME ON!
The Antidote to Electile Function
Pelosi and the Pussy-Hacks
Oh Craptain my Craptain
Lord of the Despised
Speaker of the LouseAdd a comment
Under the slogan "Waste Not Want Not" Pelosi remains adamant about running for minority leader since her new face doesn't expire until 2014
Nutrition expert that lost 27 pounds on junk food plans experiment in light-headedness by registering Democrat
California being dubbed the "Lindsay Lohan of States" by the Wall Street Journal ignites rivalry and resent between Lohan and Charlie Sheen.
Rumors circulate that President Bush's memoir reveals Karl "The Architect" Rove's building material of choice was playing cards.Add a comment
This country, in the best sense, went from a sort of purgatory, to liberal hell, and now it just clawed itself back into purgatory.
Despite Obama's snark about not giving the GOP the keys to the car, it is more clear than ever that he definitely not allowed to do the driving.
Oh, that's cute....Johnny B is trying to fit in with the cool kid....
So does the New Yorker live in Wonderland or what? What the hell are they trying to say here? That Boehner will be seeking approval from a no-nonsense Obama? They clearly missed the part where the GOP told him to buckle up because the car is about to hit a wall called "no compromise."
The only fist bumping we should be seeing on the cover of any magazine is Obama's fist bumping his arrogant face. Talk about global warming...think about the hot air that would come out of that blow.
Denial may not be a river in Africa, but it definitely flows through the liberal establishment more freely than the air between Biden's ears.Add a comment
Is this a dream come true or what? (my comments in yellow)
Despite widespread complaints about massive losses that will put Democrats in the minority, Speaker Nancy Pelosi said Friday she will try to stay on as leader of her party in the House.
The decision exposed a rift between Pelosi's liberal allies and the dwindling number of moderate Democrats closet Republicans?, who feel besieged and eager for substantive and symbolic changes in direction after Tuesday's Republican rout. It also is likely to trigger leadership battles farther down the ladder.
Pelosi, the nation's first female speaker, said many colleagues urged her to seek the post of minority leader in the new Congress that convenes in January the core of liberal ideology, after all, is rewarding failure. That will be the Democrats' top post, because Republicans, who grabbed more than 60 Democratic-held seats Tuesday, will elect the next speaker. It will be John Boehner of Ohio, who will swap titles with Pelosi if she succeeds in her bid.
"We have no intention of allowing our great achievements to be rolled back," Pelosi, 70, said in a letter to her colleagues. Is she talking about the GOP or the voters?
Read the entire article here
I don't know how much more plainly I can put this. If the achievements under her speakership were so great she would be the speaker come January. What she is putting on display now is NOT arrogance, we had the luxury of calling it that BEFORE the unwashed masses, with their naturally occuring wrinkles, had their say.
Since the office of Vice President is somewhat more...um...prominent (relative to an inch worm's erection) than anything that comes out of Congress I think we overlook the fact that the only person in Washington DC whose dearth of intelligence can rival Joe Biden's would be Nancy Pelosi's.
I'm willing to concede that I could be wrong. Joe's real problem is that makes gaffes. When he said FDR got on TV in 1929, that was an honest mistake....he knows FDR's actually RECORD television, and they weren't even invented yet anyways...soooo....
There is a sincerity to the words that come out of Pelosi's tightly pursed mouth. Extra words can hurt, so when she says they have to pass bills to find out what's in them she is sincere because her face muscles can't afford her not to be. She may indeed be dumber.
In the end the Democrats have to do what is best for the country, so I hope she wins so she can flex the Dems minority party muscle.
Don't worry that's nothing a little botox can't firm up!Add a comment
I don't know...cynicism may be too nice of a way to put it...
This is a classic chicken/egg conundrum. Have liberals always been THIS morally depraved, or has the culture bar dropped so low that they now limbo to innocent people dying so inept piles of pinko poop can get their mojo back?
Does tubby there even realize that it wouldn't even be real mojo? He's basically suggesting we need to be tricked into liking Obama again. How??? (look for it at 1:05)...
How did the culture get to this point where the comedians aren't the indelicate pricks before liberal pundits?
There is a moment when Obama can "reconnect" with America in a way that doesn't require liberals to step outside of their abortion bubble and accept the deaths of innocent people as an acceptable means to an end. Its really simple...SERVE THE INTERESTS OF THE NATION AND NOT HIS EGO FED POLITICS!
When we get a chance we should make sure Biden knows "mojo" isn't his paparazzi code name for the time he daydreamed hooking up with Michelle.
h/t iOwnTheWorldAdd a comment
He mentioned it in his election night victory speech. That seems so weird to me. When was he married to Barbara and why did take her name?
Is it safe to say that it was a same-sex marriage
I'm so confused!Add a comment
As India's government removes coconuts from trees to protect Obama, the President graciously resists urge to classify the trees as "enemies"
Upon hearing Obama brought 34 U.S. warships to India, pawn shop owners aware of U.S. debt eagerly await a Presidential visit
White House aides reveal Obama determined how to spend rest of TARP money using the "heads Vegas, tails India" method.Add a comment
This amazing trick was originally posted at my favorite conservative blog, iOwnTheWorld, if you're as amazed at how well it works as I am then PLEASE pass it on!!!
I have no idea how this works. This is pretty amazing!
Now … be honest and don’t look at the movie list till you have done the math!
Just do the test.
This amazing math quiz can predict which of the 18 films you would enjoy the most.
Don’t ask me how, but it really works!
Pick a number from 1-9.
Multiply by 3.
Multiply by 3 again.
Now add the digits together to find your predicted favorite movie in the list of 18 movies below.
1. Gone With The Wind
3. Beverly Hills Cop
4. Star Wars
5. Forrest Gump
6. The Good, The Bad, and the Ugly
9. The Defeat of Obama in 2012
11. Jurassic Park
13. Pirates of the Caribbean
15. Raiders Of The Lost Ark
16. Home Alone
17. Mrs. Doubtfire
18. Toy Story
Be honest, you got chills, didn't you?Add a comment
Obama confesses purpose of India trip is to load up on curry so he can truly understand voter sentiment on election day
Considering a run for minority leader Pelosi said to be angling for "Speaker of the Louse"
Exhausted Obama agrees with Biden that it is "weird" that he could lose in 2012 to a guy named Generic RepublicanAdd a comment