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Top 10 Signs President Obama is a Narcissist

10. Michelle never worries about him cheating because the only thing he checks out are mirrors.

9. He tries to get the FDA to register the sound of his voice as a form of Viagra based on "personal experience."

8. Bad acoustics forced him to go with the flow on "yes we can" even though it should have been "yes HE can."

7. He thinks being called "Zero" is a compliment since everything should start with him anyway.

6. He once proposed in a department of education meeting that schools should replace periods with his logo, since everything should end with him too.

5. He stopped using notecards when he realized he could see his reflection in teleprompters.

4. He secretly wears a locket that contains a photo of him on one side and a mirror on the other.

3. He believes there is a cosmic connection between the invention of the wheel and the shape of his logo.

2. There is no birth certificate, his mother told him he always was and always will be...

1. He's not bowing before world leaders, he's looking down on them.

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Bill Clinton To Work For The TSA?

Tiger Woods becomes honorary congressman

Man, he looks like he's getting a little chunky when he sits around staring at tail instead of chasing it.

If its tough to read you can click the image to see a larger version.

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Conservative Satire Headlines November 15, 2010

Becoming the first ever former president to be hired as a TSA screener Bill Clinton calls dibs on stewardesses

White House continues to deny emerging feud between President Obama and Kieth Olbermann's egos.

Ireland's fiscal desperation reach fever pitch as nation turns its hopes to 4 leaf clover harvesting.

Signs of turmoil within Obama Administration continue as VP Biden allegedly insists he be called Senator again.

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Porky Pig Guides Obama on Abortion Stance

This video has been around for a while, but its existence just came to my attention. A sort of companion to Obama vs. a 12 Year Old

h/t to Mr. Pinko at iOwnTheWorld

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Who Is The American Narcissus?

If I wasn't going to say who you would've needed only one guess anyway...

Barack Obama is American Narcissus

This piece is based on an article in the latest edition of The Weekly Standard, "American Narcissus" by Jonathan V. Last. It's a rare that an article manages to truly grab me from start to finish....

Why has Barack Obama failed so spectacularly? Is he too dogmatically liberal or too pragmatic? Is he a socialist, or an anticolonialist, or a philosopher-president? Or is it possible that Obama’s failures stem from something simpler: vanity. Politicians as a class are particularly susceptible to mirror-gazing. But Obama’s vanity is overwhelming. It defines him, his politics, and his presidency.

It’s revealed in lots of little stories. There was the time he bragged about how one of his campaign volunteers, who had tragically died of breast cancer, “insisted she’s going to be buried in an Obama T-shirt.” There was the Nobel acceptance speech where he conceded, “I do not bring with me today a definitive solution to the problems of war” (the emphasis is mine). There was the moment during the 2008 campaign when Obama appeared with a seal that was a mash-up of the Great Seal of the United States and his own campaign logo (with its motto Vero Possumus, “Yes we Can” in Latin). Just a few weeks ago, Obama was giving a speech when the actual presidential seal fell from the rostrum. “That’s all right,” he quipped. “All of you know who I am.” Oh yes, Mr. President, we certainly do.

My favorite is this line from page 160 of The Audacity of Hope:

I find comfort in the fact that the longer I’m in politics the less nourishing popularity becomes, that a striving for power and rank and fame seems to betray a poverty of ambition, and that I am answerable mainly to the steady gaze of my own conscience.

So popularity and fame once nourished him, but now his ambition is richer and he’s answerable not, like some presidents, to the Almighty, but to the gaze of his personal conscience. Which is steady. The fact that this sentence appears in the second memoir of a man not yet 50 years old—and who had been in national politics for all of two years—is merely icing.

Read the rest at The Weekly Standard.

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Salvaging Obama's Presidency...

Obama's in the dark

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Obama vs. a 12 Year Old

From the mouths of babes...

I've made snarky remarks that the child can deconstruct Obama's arguments, but I didn't know it was actually true! (yes I did)

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Caption Fun: What's Going On With Biden?

A picture is worth 1,000 words, so lets find a few of 'em...

Biden looks like the Joker

When I a was a boy my teacher asked me to spell "plagiarism" and I said you tell me first, then I'll tell you...

Did you know you can't star 69 a text message?

No no, this is how you say it...."why so socialist?"

Did you know the red phone in the Oval Office isn't for Batman....or phone sex?

Barney said I can be his fruit fly!

Farting makes me sound smart!

Nancy had me at her Botox party, can you tell I just had my cheeks done?

My hairplugs tickle!

I think my eyes are smiling too.

Even though we lost the House Barack said I can still have a puppy!

Comment with your best shot(s)!

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American Medicine vs. Israel, Germany, and Russia

Received this story in an email...

Four doctors are having a discussion. One is Israeli, one is German, one is Russian and one is American.

The doctor from Israel says: "In Israel the medicine is so advanced that we cut off a man's testicles; we put them into another man, and in six weeks he is looking for work."

The German doctor comments: "That's nothing. In Germany we take part of the brain out of a person; we put it into another person's head, and in four weeks he is looking for work."

The Russian doctor says: "That's nothing either. In Russia we take out half of the heart from a person; we put it into another person's chest, and in two weeks he is looking for work."

The U.S. doctor answers immediately: "That's nothing my colleagues. You are way behind us. In the USA we grabbed a person with no brains, no heart, and no balls . . . we made him President of the United States, and now the whole country is looking for work!!!

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Conservative Satire Headlines November 12, 2010

Pelosi's bid for House Minority Leader scores major affirmation of confidence in her leadership with an endorsement from the RNC

Advisors to Biden suggest President would stop finding out his code names he uses to talk trash if the VP didn't end them with "AKA Barack."

Obama's name mysteriously appears on list of names of Thanksgiving turkeys to pardon.

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