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Obama Pardons Largest Turkey Ever

Barney wants TSA pat down

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Thankful for the Blissful Ignorance of Some Americans

A couple of days ago I received a tweet on Twitter from a liberal I didn't know, the whole thing seemed random, but I'm thankful for the message she wanted me to receive.

Thanksgiving celebrates the day native Americans shared the harvest with illegal immigrants.

I don't want to reveal the handle of this microblogging sage, lest a stampede of tweeps rush her like some wise person atop an ant hill. That would be a precarious journey, especially for me, I HATE ants...definitely not thankful for childhood issues.

I will say that part of her Twitter handle shares the name of a certain plastic blond doll employed by Mattel and has proportions that are WAY more realistic than a liberals ability to think clearly about anything.

This tweet really got me thinking though. I mean, we all know that Native American's (NOT Indians) got a REALLY raw deal from European settlers, but not from the pilgrims Squanto helped! That Thanksgiving was pretty hunky dory. Yeah, hunky dory had a short shelf life, but so did the Obama luster and we'll have to live with that forever in the history books. So don't discount the good, however temporary, that sprang from the first ever Thanksgiving.

I then started to wonder how Native Americans and Pilgrims fit into the equasion of what Thanksgiving is today. Even though it started with that group, they were giving thanks for surviving the winter in an unfamiliar land without dying. By contrast, today we (hopefully) observe this day as a chance to reflect on being thankful for living in the most prosperous and abundant land that God has ever granted his children.

Everything we have and do makes our cup overflow, and nothing proves this to be more true than the abundance of time the poorest people in America have to say the dumbest things on things like Twitter with their cell phones when poor people in other countries spend every waking hour trying to find water they can drink without it killing them.

And then I thought, well, if doll brains wants to trip on her own guilt over what happened to the Native Americans in the years after the first Thanksgiving she is more than welcome to not buy a turkey, or any of the other ingredients needed to make a balanced turkey day meal, and just blow the money she would've spent on the nickle slots at her local Indian casino (now we can call them Indians, we get what we pay for).

Lastly, I couldn't get over this notion the pilgrims could be considered illegal immigrants. I think that it was meant to inspire guilt over public disapproval of illegal immigrants in the country today. After all, they're just here to enjoy a spread of the finest fixings our government can provide: welfare, free hospital visits, education, employment without verification, and this delicious meal is all tied together with a big HUGE helping of taxpayer money turkey.

Just like the pilgrims.

All of that stuff swirled in my head, and I just had to respond to this tweet. Then it came to me...

Which immigration laws were broken?

...I'm still waiting for doll brains's response.

I'm thankful that ignorance really is bliss in America. I'm even more thankful that can it be swatted down so easily and publicly, for the edification of others, through the exchange of speech, ideas and technology that only comes with American freedom, a freedom that no other country can truly boast.

I'm also thankful that it can be done in 140 characters or less.

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Happy Turkey Day (view this AFTER you eat)

Thanks to iOwnTheWorld for this, go to their blog to see more AWESOME Thanksgiving Day art aimed at liberals!

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Conservative Satire Headlines November 24, 2010

Biden joins Charles Rangle in temper tantrum over not being chosen by President Obama for a Thanksgiving pardon.

China and Russia discontinue use of dollar as basis for trade in effort to seek something with greater and more stable value, sand from the Sahara.

Palin blames "North Korean allies" gaffe on aide who told her today was National "Talk Like a Liberal" Day.

Barbara Bush resents Palin calling her "blue blood," accuses her of being insensitive to the fact she now runs on formaldehyde.

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The President's Thoughts on the TSA 'Fiasco'

Another great post from iOwnTheWorld...

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Conservative Satire Headlines November 23, 2010

Britain to counter North Korean strike on the South by having Queen re-gift Obama's campaign speech filled iPod to Kim Jong un

Calls for psychological probes begin when an off-duty TSA Officer reportedly requires family to be pad-down before entering the family minivan.

TSA screeners call for weight profiling, say searching rolls of obese people is a "big fat waste of time."

Pelosi announces she will now fly commercial to the dismay of TSA screeners and broom makers alike.

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NBC Celebrates Person of the Year On Opposite Day?

NBC and its affiliates have been trounced in ratings over the last several years. With stations like MSNBC under their belt and liberals such as Matt Lauer and Keith Olbermann hosting programs, NBC is clearly disconnected with the average American. Another clear sign of their mismanagement: naming Sharif El-Gamal, developer of the Ground Zero Mosque, one of their "People of the Year."

Read the rest at the Pundit Press (via Memeorandum)

What's this? Is the network itching like the yeast infection it is on Lady Liberty to do something to satisfy the void it must feel when Keith Olbermann ditched his World's Worst Person schitck?

What geniuses we have over there at NBC! Just go ahead and swing the pendulum the other way and find someone doing something despicable and then honor them. Is that supposed to change our minds about the Ground Zero Mosque. Are these idiots so full of themselves that they think a suck up session with Matt Lauer will win over the victims of 9-11?

Other "winners" (and don't get me wrong, some of them really deserve the designation) can be found here.

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North Korea: The Great Asian Puppet Show

The South Korean military went to "crisis status" on Tuesday and threatened military strikes after the North fired dozens of shells at a South Korean island, killing two of the South's soldiers and setting off an exchange of fire in one of the most serious clashes between the two sides in decades.

President Lee Myung-bak met with security-related ministers and senior aides in the underground situation room at the Blue House, the presidential office and residence, and ordered strikes on North Korea's missile base if the North made any "indication of further provocation," The Korea Herald quoted a presidential spokesman, Hong Sang-pyo, as saying.

The North blamed the South for starting the exchange; the South acknowledged firing test shots in the area but denied that any had fallen in the North's territory. It was in the same area that a South Korean naval vessel, the Cheonan, was sunk in March, killing 46 sailors. Seoul blamed a North Korean torpedo attack; the North has denied any role.

Read the rest at the New York Times (via Memeorandum)

Details aren't totally clear but it looks like Lil' Kim Jong Il son is apparently the one who ordered the attack. He wants to show us he has some brass ones.

I always try to find the humor in everything, but I'm not sure I can here. The bum on the street who lives in a shopping cart and conducts important meetings in their head is amusing until he gets that nuke and plugs this... to it.

North Korea is like some great Asian ventriloquist act. Everyone is entertained by the dummy and forgets about the puppet master controling it.

I have a really hard time believing that country does anything without at least a little bit of advance knowledge from China. Acts like this are toe dips in the water. Every time something like this happens it isn't really about South Korea, America is being tested.

One can hope President Obama will understand this, but his approval rating is at 39% and everything is reversed through that mirror of his. So he needs stop staring at himself and turn around to figure out its not 93%, and you can't reason with people who want to see us destroyed anymore.

In many ways our country is in a precarious position, I understand that. I also know I don't have all the facts, but I do know that we've been speaking softly for too long, and it plunges the world deeper to the point of no return. At some point, I'm afraid (but I hope I'm wrong), a big stick of some sort will have to get us out.

Oh boy, not that one Barry...

Please pray for the people of South Korea.

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Is Obama His Gift To Women?

This holiday season...

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Conservative Satire Headlines November 22, 2010

While Palin is said to not be offended by Barbara Bush's wish that she stay in Alaska, she did express a wish for Bush to stay in "the land of irrelevant."

Palin says refusal to do interview with Katie Couric again based on fact that wet paint on walls the walls of America has higher viewership.

Being informed that Palin would never do another interview with Katie Couric, a disinterested Couric retorts that she doesn't even know who Palin is talking about.

Biden complains START treaty with Russia is to complicated for him to read, proposes name change to GO

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