Everyone knows how this works, if I missed any good ones let me know by commenting below!
10. Didn’t know about the spill because the teleprompters were on vacation.
9. Someone challenged him to see how many rounds of golf he can play before people get pissed.
8. Didn’t want to act until his team created an oil spill graphic that incorporated his logo
7. Was too busy waterboarding Rahm Emmanuel for answers on why his cabinet calls him President Jenga.
6. Didn’t know where to go because “Caution Slippery Floor” signs wont stand on water.
5. Wasn’t sure it was actually that bad after seeing gulf residents with “this is what change looks like” signs.
4. Clean up the ocean? Pssh he was just waiting for the iPhone to release the app for that.
3. Wanted to test Keith Olbermann’s theory that rednecks would avoid the beach if the ocean was black.
2. Hasn’t cared about oil since Air Force One was retrofitted to run on the magic of the 2008 election.
1. Being asked “did you plug the hole yet daddy” at least 50 times while being president was actually an item on his "bucket list."
You probably know by now what the Chairman of BP Carl-Henric Svanberg has had to say about who BP cares about...
Small people, small people, we care about the SMALL people...who are these small people? The leprechauns dancing in his head?
The collection of Barack action figures that the president forgot to gift to the queen?
In any case, to quote the great Paul Harvey, here is the REST of the story...
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You've likely seen cartoons from conservative cartoonist Michael Ramirez in the past, this is the best political cartoon I've seen in a while. This guy is awesome. Check out more of his work here.
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As a graphic designer this is a subject that has been interesting and frightening to me for a long time now. Check out this fascinating and important video on iconography from Bill Whittle of Pajamas TV its 8 minutes long, but its so good it feels like 30 seconds.
I actually saw this video months ago, and it has served for inspiration and motivation for several pieces I've done (and can be found on my art page) since viewing it...
I would love to know how many other drafts or concepts were worked up before coming to "the one." Even better, how many times did his team have to convince Obama that a picture of him looking into a mirror wont work with the American people as well as it works for him.
He puts that logo on EV-ER-Y-THING......I'm not that old but I'm pretty sure we haven't seen narcissism like this out of a political leader in this country, like, ever.
I can hear the libs now saying all I want to do is tear down the president rather than try to build up the country with him. Thats precisely what the problem has been with his campaign to be president all the way up until today. The Obama presidency has not been about a legacy for America. The Obama presidency has been by, for, and about Barack Obama.
We can say a lot about George W. Bush, or any other president, but we can't say that.
This idea can't be better demonstrated than at 2:35 into the video when Whittle shows an Obama campaign poster from 2008 that not only includes Obama's logo with all the other icon's of what America is, but Obama's logo actually comes front, center, and superseding all the other icons, which are faded to background status.
George W. Bush had the "W," which Whittle calls "amateur hour" because of its impact. However, the W in the video was shown flying the American flag. The W was HOLDING UP American ideals. Obama's logo has been and is continually seeking to REPLACE them.
Remember that every time you see Obama's logo. I, and many others, tear it down like its a present at Christmas because it MUST be torn down.
In the end the very American ideals Obama seeks to make secondary to the symbol of him will hopefully be his undoing, because they are bigger and more powerful than he is.
When the Tea Party says they want us to take this country back, they don't mean it in the partisan sense of voting Democrats out so they can be replace with Republicans. They want us to LITERALLY take back the country. It's not going to be the personal playground of ill received "leaders" any longer.
This can only be true if Americans will be willing and able to wield power of the 1st Amendment, endowed by God and not government.
How long do you think that will last when any president attempts to make our government centered around them and not our ideals. Not long if we don't do something about it.Add a comment
I think I'm starting to understand one of the reasons why President Amateur Hour slaps his logo on EVERYTHING. To give the perception that HE is in CONTROL. I'm not sure that tactic is going to actually work for him for too much longer....
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I think this could help explain why North Carolina Democratic Congressman Bob Etheridge attacked those college students the other day...click the respective years to see the "before and after" of the whole story.
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We conservatives like to gag when Obama, almost half way through his presidency (note I didn't say first term) continues to blame Bush for everything except the hangnail on his finger.
I don't know how much conservatives can really quarrel with this excuse.
We may "miss" W now, but there's something to this. Reagan's success got George H.W. Bush elected, and Clinton's "success" did get more people to vote for Al Gore.
This is from No Sheeples Here, and I'm filing it under "I wish I thought of this".Add a comment
Here are the latest additions to the Satire Headlines Archive (starting with the most recent):
DURING VISIT TO GULF OBAMA CALLS DIBS ON TARBALLS SO HE CAN SAVE MONEY AT HIS DRIVING RANGE - June 11
HELEN THOMAS CONFESSES RESENTMENT OF JEWS BEGAN AS A LITTLE GIRL GETTING "JERKED AROUND BY THIS MOSES GUY" - June 11
HARRY REID POINTS OUT SAME RASMUSSEN POLL SHOWS HIM BEATING SHARON ANGLE IF THE DECIDING FACTOR WAS FEMININITY - June 10
PETA FILES CLASS ACTION SUIT CHARGING IRAN WITH SLANDER AFTER CALLING UN SANCTIONS "ANNOYING FLIES" - June 10
CAUGHT IN ANOTHER CASE OF SELECTIVE HEARING BARNEY FRANK APOLOGIZES TO OBAMA FOR OFFERING UP HIS "ASS TO SLICK" - June 9
BIDEN'S IDEA TO CLEAN OIL SPILL BY DUMPING "GAS GUZZLING" SUV'S IN OCEAN REJECTED AFTER CAREFUL CONSIDERATION - June 9
FLORIDA OIL CLEAN UP CONTINUES AFTER MAGIC GENIE GRANTS A CHOICE BETWEEN THE SLICK OR A RETIRED HELEN THOMAS - June 8
MINUTES AFTER ANNOUNCING RETIREMENT HELEN THOMAS IS OFFERED JOB AT DISNEYLAND AS THE WITCH FROM SNOW WHITE - June 7
OBAMA SAYS DEALING WITH OIL SPILL RATES SOMEWHERE ON HIS "BUMMER SCALE" BETWEEN RIM SHOTS AND DOUBLE BOGEYS - June 7Add a comment
You can check out volume 1 from last March here.
Your child confesses to living a double life that's 3 letters and starts with G, and you hope it's G-A-Y and not G-O-P...
You think the only way to keep all of Obama's czars straight is to appoint a Czar Sorting Czar...
You think the popularity of Che Guevara t-shirts is a great example of how free-market capitalism works...
You're a hippie that wants to do your part by buying energy efficient light bulbs, now all you need is a home to use them in...
You're from Florida, you voted for Al Gore in 2000, and the name Chad makes you apoplectic...
You and your friends from PETA walk out of the movie that fantasized about George W. Bush's assassination, and during a heated debate over whether there could be a sequel you accidentally step on a bug and kill it, rendering you inconsolable...
You're so bad at Wii Bowling you play with an avatar that looks like Obama...
You hate taxes because counting is hard and you would rather give the IRS your bank routing and account numbers so they can just take what they think you owe...
A botox addled Nancy Pelosi gets emotional at a press conference and you cry for her because she can't...
You smell bad, your dirty dread-locked hair smells even worse, you can't remember your name, you can't spell "job" much less hold one, you can't bathe because your bathtub holds all your used bong water (because you never know when you're gonna need it bro), and you think marijuana should be legalized because its a victimless crime...
You think tax day is in the spring when everything blooms because money grows on taxpayers...
If you try to sell one of your used, unfinished cigarettes on eBay because it got a drag bummed off it from President Obama...
You think conservatives need to stop "waging war on science" and need to start worrying about the potential capsizing of Guam...
You don't understand why Disney fans think Nancy Pelosi hates dalmatians...
You don't breathe a sigh of relief when Obama drops Biden in 2012 and replaces him with the fifth grader who beat him...
"Kicking ass" on national TV isn't a "big f**king deal," and "terrorism" is racial slur...
YOU MIGHT BE A LIBERAL!Add a comment
The saga continues, if you don't know what I'm talking about click the thumbnails at the bottom of the post to see the first parts of it and get up to speed.
Click the image above to see a larger version.
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If only she could have that anti-semetic moment on camera back....
That could get the Jews off her back.
I guess as a disclaimer I should mention this is pure satire...if its not ABUNDANTLY apparent.Add a comment
A fun trend on Twitter called #AssesBarryKicked has been making the rounds, here's a partial and evolving list (a mix of humor and serious):
The Dem Majority
Glistening presidential pecs
Respect for Supreme Court
Accepting fault (Bush's fault)
His daughters at Stratego
Martha Coakley’s Senate Campaign
Jihad (the word, not the ideology)
The Olympics in Chicago
Jimmy Carter's legacy
My favorites from Twitter:
37 bowling pins
“The fools who voted for him”
Marine “Corpse” men
The idea that experience doesn't matter
Jon Corzine's gubernatorial campaign
Democrats on November 2, 2010
America's 57 States
Comment below with your contributions.Add a comment
Is this President Obama when he's angry? Seriously?
Once again he breaks the boundaries of presidential decorum. This guy isn't the president of a college fraternity. He is one of only 43 people in the history of a nation of hundreds of millions who have had the honor and privilege to hold one of the greatest positions of power in the history of mankind.....and he's looking for an "ass to kick?"
Yeah, Matt Lauer prodded him, but THATS MATT LAUER. He is the PRESIDENT. Shouldn't someone be the adult here? Whats worse is Lauer said "kick butt," Obama turned it into "ass." It was totally gratuitous for him to do that.
If he wants to talk like that behind his beloved closed doors then by all means go for it, but knock it off with the foul language on national television. Children look up to you and I'm sure their parents don't want to compete with your mouth.
Can you imagine if either President Bush or Ronald Reagan talked like that? ME NEITHER! It wouldn't happen! It didn't happen!
For crying out loud Reagan couldn't bring himself to take off his jacket when he was in the Oval Office, meanwhile Democrats get oral sex, drop f-bombs on hot mics, and say "ass" on national television like its on their presidential bucket list.
If Obama thinks he was on this from the beginning then he should hand that memo to Bobby Jindal and David Vitter, who demanded dredging and sand berms for WEEKS before they got permits Obama could've had issued in an instant. Instead, they come after oil hits that states coast.
The reaction to this has been a joke, literally, because when this all broke Obama was playing around with the Jonas Brothers at the White House Correspondents Dinner.
NOW Obama wants to KICK ASS?!? He can't have it, he's not a fit for that part, but I have another role in mind for him...
(As always, click on the picture to see a larger version in all its glory)Add a comment
I had a vigorous internal debate about posting this video, because I don't want liberals to see it and launch a lawsuit to strike the Star Spangled Banner Down as unconstitutional.
I actually did know, but I have to admit I wouldn't be able to begin telling it to you. Thanks public education!
And who said we're not a Christian nation?
Oh, uhhhhh, ok.....Pardon me for getting in the way of Captain Ambiguous.Add a comment
President Obama celebrated the 66th Anniversary of D-Day by ignoring it and going to the Ford Theatre, the theatre where Abraham Lincoln was assissinated.
The whole event was being taped to be aired for some July 4th special, so a lot of VIP's were there, including a Lincoln impersonator who got to meet Obama. Since Obama has been compared to one of our greatest presidents (if not THE greatest) since BEFORE he was even elected I thought of the perfect product endorsement to commemorate the meeting.
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