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l Bet Reid Can Fit The Names His Supporters on His Hand

UPDATE: Apparently according to some readers my attempt at a clever pun of a headline for this post (Palin's Palm Pilot Should Reid (meaning "read"...haha, but not really) Into The Flattery of Imitation) didn't work too well, so it has been changed to something that "makes sense," post starts now:


Harry Reid is starting to make me think I've been channeling way too much energy into painting Biden as a gaffe factory


Why is the club so smokey if there is only one pers-Ohhh, its Obama

Its bad enough that Harry Reid views the Senate as a sort of open mic night at some smokey Vegas chuckle shack with only one patron busting out punchlines like Obama can hide his negro dialect, and ObamaCare opponents would fight for slavery, but now I'm starting to worry that he has run out of ideas for his own material. I mean really, the Palin hand joke...again?

What Reid should have remembered to write on that hand is that needed to tell that joke two months ago when it may have been funny to people who think toilet humor is for phD's.

You betcha!

How about this one Harry, can you fit the names of every person actually willing to vote for you on your hand?

And did you hear the woman that almost stepped on Reid's "joke"? She wants the Tea Partiers to "drop dead"...

Well lady, we're rubber and Reid is glue...whatever YOU say bounces off of us and sticks to HIS chances for reelection.

I swear, if the GOP doesn't take this seat....

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Meet Obama's New Teleprompter

It looks like Obama's oratory skills need a tune up before he starts being known as President Motormouth.

aka ObamaCare

Recently at a meeting where Obama was to force-feeding prime rib to a vegan a woman known as Doris questioned the him on the wisdom of piling on to the tax burden and informed him we are taxed too much already. What ensued was a 17 minute, 2500 word response.

yes we ca-aaaaaaaa - wwwnnn zzzzzzzzzz

The conclusion of the rant prompted a rousing. Nope, didn't forget to finish that sentence with "applause"...they had to wake up first.

Perhaps he was trying to be so boring that even Jesus would forget to rise for Easter yesterday. We know how much liberals hate competition.

Baseball season has started and maybe like a starting pitcher that has had enough Obama needs to bring in a relief teleprompter with a fresh take on his speeches. So meet Obama's new teleprompter.


As you can see this idea is something of a grassroots effort. Eat your heart out Tea Party.

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New Poem: The Haiku About ObamaCare 2

The latest Haiku to added the (newly created) haiku section...


ObamaCare is
The Dems think like a tumor
It will grow on you

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Happy Easter, Sans That Bunny

I was traveling and visiting family this weekend, so I was a bit indisposed. Now that the day is all but over I wanted to at least acknowledge what is the most important day of the year next to Christmas.

A big thanks to Lori Ziganto over at iOwnTheWorld.com for posting this first and inspiring me to share what is a beautiful rendition of arguably the most beautiful song (or at least one of them) ever created.



Happy Easter.

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The Haiku About Good Friday

The latest Haiku to added the poetry section...


Jesus died this day
Obama has fooled a few
God's kids don't buy it

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If You Think Islands Float, You MUST Be A Liberal

Many of you have probably already seen this. While I wish this was an April fools joke...I'm so glad it isn't...because its just too good...



One thing not in their water...
REAL islands

This guy represents the 4th District of Georgia, which is where his predecessor and fellow screwloose Cynthia McKinney came from. Clearly, there is something in the water in that part of Georgia.

I know the quality of the video isn't too great, but you can almost see the Admiral trying to hold back his smirk, and the woman behind him is less successful, when he says they don't anticipate the island...capsizing...

Does this man not have congressional aides who can help him figure out what an island is?!? Does he think these masses of land are just bobbing in the water like the rubber duckies he plays with in his bathtub?!?

More importantly how many more of these incidents must the country endure before the Dan Quayle is even? The media TRIES to grant radio silence to the idiotic things liberals say, but

They say

"Who are these people?" To busts of George Washington and Benjamin Franklin at Monticello (Al Gore)

FDR went on TV when he was President in 1929 (Joe Biden)

There are 57 states (President Obama)

Islands capsize (Hank Johnson)

We say

Potatoe...which could have been right if Quayle had only tried pretending the girl was trying to spell "POTATOES"

Potatoe

Potatoe

Potatoe

Its funny, but its also a little enraging. This man he works half as hard, and has a quarter of the intelligence of a paint sniffing ditch digger in a coma, and he gets paid roughly $175,000 per year to dictate how we should live our lives. This man voted for ObamaCare, he has power that puts the fate of this country in his hands.

Redistribution of IQ is socialism we can believe in

We have to hear from liberals how conservatives with their voodoo magic beliefs that used to be known to most of them as Christianity are mentally ill equipped to be in charge of stuff. As far as I'm concerned they're way behind the 8-ball if we have to keep score in the IQ wars. Theres no doubt where the Vegas easy money would go if the two parties had to stack up against Jeff Foxworthy's 5th graders.

Its no wonder we get ideas like ObamaCare, and cap and tax, and reparations, and blah blah blah the list could go on forever...These people can barely handle basic facts of life.



Well, they don't have brains for brains...THATS for sure

***UPDATE*** Some who have read this are admonishing me to go easy on the guy because he has Hepatitis C...the last time I checked that affects the liver, which would explain this video perfectly if someone can medically prove to me that liberals have livers for brains.

That just begs the question: If Dick Cheney should have stepped down as vice president because of his heart condition, should liberals (or anyone for that matter) be allowed to make country altering decisions when they're "brain" damaged?


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Satire Headline Archive Update March 15-31

Here are the latest additions to the Headlines Archive



INTERNAL FACEBOOK POLL FINDS USERS FEEL HAVING BOTH A DNC AND AN IRS FAN PAGE IS REDUNDANT - March 31

SARKOZY EXPLAINS TO BIDEN IRAN IS THE NAME OF A ROGUE NATION AND NOT OFFICIAL FRENCH FOREIGN POLICY - March 30

INSPIRED BY THE MOVIE "THE BLIND SIDE" OBAMA APPLIES TO BE THE LEGAL GUARDIAN OF HIS TELEPROMPTER - March 30

OBAMA DELIVERS ULTIMATUM TO KARZAI TO STOP AFGHAN CORRUPTION OR ACCEPT A POSITION IN HIS ADMINISTRATION - March 29

FOCUSED U.N. MOVES SWIFTLY ON SINKING OF SOUTH KOREAN SHIP BY PASSING RESOLUTION DENOUNCING ISRAEL - March 26

GROWING TIRED OF SAYING OBAMACARE IS PEOPLE'S VICTORY OBAMA HIRES SARCASM CZAR - March 26

DEMS WANT CONGRESSIONAL "DON'T ASK DON'T TELL" LIFTED SO THEY CAN SAY HOW THEY REALLY FEEL ABOUT AMERICA - March 25

BARNEY FRANK DECLARES LOVE OF DICTATORS UNTIL AIDE INFORMS HIM THEY’RE NOT PENIS-SHAPED FRENCH FRIES - March 25

PRO-CHOICE GROUP INADVERTENTLY SUPPORTS OBAMACARE PROTESTERS CHANTING "KEEP YOUR LAWS OFF MY BODY" - March 24

BIDEN SAYS "BIG F-ING DEAL" NOT OVER HEALTH CARE BILL, OBAMA PROMISED HE CAN COME INSIDE WHITE HOUSE NOW - March 23

STUPAK SAYS DEMS OSTRACIZED HIM LIKE HE WAS ROSIE O'DONNELL IN A POLICE LINE-UP OF WOMEN - March 23

BIDEN CHANTS "WE HAVE GOVERNMENT HEALTH CARE" AS BEMUSED DEMOCRATS WONDER WHO "WE" IS SUPPOSED TO BE - March 22

BARNEY FRANK LOSES BET TO OBAMA ON WHO CAN BLOW THE DEMOCRAT MAJORITY FASTER - March 22

DEMS SUPPORTING OBAMACARE BECOME UNDECIDED WHEN THEY REALIZE THE PROCEDURE IS "DEEM AND PASS" NOT "DEMON PASS" - March 19

OBAMA'S DELAY OF TRIP TO SOUTH PACIFIC FOR HEALTH VOTE HAILED BY DEM LEADERS AND CHIROPRACTOR DR. NOBOWMA - March 19

BIDEN CANCELS TRIP TO HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES AFTER READING ON WIKIPEDIA HE CAN ONLY BREAK TIES IN THE SENATE - March 19

THREATS AGAINST DEMOCRATS OPPOSING OBAMACARE GRADUATE FROM WATERBOARDING TO ERIC MASSA TICKLE SESSIONS - March 18

BIDEN SUFFERS "WICKED" ST. PATTY'S DAY HANGOVER, SWEARS HE'LL NEVER DRINK GREEN ODOULS AGAIN - March 18

WHITE HOUSE ST. PATRICKS DAY FESTIVITIES END WHEN BIDEN GETS SO DRUNK HE CAN EXPLAIN QUANTUM PHYSICS - March 17

DEMS SUPPORTING OBAMACARE BECOME UNDECIDED WHEN THEY REALIZE THE PROCEDURE IS "DEEM AND PASS" NOT "DEMON PASS" - March 16

POLL FINDS LIBERALS FINALLY CONQUER BUSH DICTATORSHIP FEARS IF DEMS "DEEM" HEALTH CARE BILL "PASSED" - March 16

HIGH COURT UPHOLDS "UNDER GOD" IN PLEDGE OF ALLEGIANCE, CAUSES ATHEIST CRACK-UP, CRIES OF "WHY GOD WHY?" - March 15

OBAMA'S DELAY OF TRIP TO SOUTH PACIFIC FOR HEALTH VOTE HAILED BY DEM LEADERS AND CHIROPRACTOR DR. NOBOWMA - March 15

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The Conservative Case For Why The Democrats Should Win In November

I know this is going to be a VERY hot button issue for many of you who know me to wear a big conservative chip on my shoulder.....so I beg you to hear me out because believe me, by the time I'm done making my case I think you will also realize that it is MUCH MUCH BETTER for the country to continue having the Democrats run the show.

I actually got this idea from another conservative blog that I enjoy so for the full list of reasons Democrats should win click here

APRIL FOOLS!

Come on people!!! I may be crazy and stupid at times, but I'll NEVER go Biden on ya. Hope you have a fun day...see ya on the other side of Easter!

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