I've seen a few of these already that I thought were ok...hopefully this one is better than the rest!
10. She realized his "I love you's" were only sincere when she was standing in front of a mirror
9. Tipper was tired of hearing him recall old Vietnam stories written by his speech writers
8. Al was way too obsessed with BUSH that's not Tipper's
7. They hadn’t had sex in so long Al started calling her “The Lock Box”
6. Tipper disagreed that spicing up the bedroom with role-playing fantasies should include "winning Florida"
5. They started to doubt their compatibility after their very first kiss at the 2000 DNC
4. Tipper was forced to sleep on the couch to make room on the bed for Al's Oscar, and the Academy Award he won for An Inconvenient Truth
3. "First one to divorce his wife is a rotten egg!" said Bill Clinton
2. She realized El Niño is Al's love child with Mother Nature
1. Divorce was payment for her silence on the global warming fraud
Levi Johnston is apologizing to the Palins, and admits he flat out lied about the things he said about them.
In other breaking news, the sun is hot, water is wet, and Senator Lindsey Graham is such a wiener that he's is the only Republican endorsed by Barney Frank.
This is just another example of Hollywood taking a useful idiot it was wielding against an effective conservative, recognizing its expired usefulness, and exercising its gag reflex.
Godspeed little man.Add a comment
Ok, so Arizona is going to have a fight about over illegal immigration with Obama....I say lets do this! Justice Kennedy just announced he's not leaving until Obama does, so lets take this bad boy to the SCOTUS.
In spite of their best efforts to paint those of us who favor SB1070 as racist, an overwhelming majority of the country is with Arizona on this and Obama knows it. So why does he insist on being on the losing end of this issue?
He's trying to distract the country from the fact that 48% of us are ready to throw an "I told you so" parade for the rest of it, whose reasons for voting for this president can't extend beyond monosyllabic bumper stickers.
Political parties always sink or swim on the health of the economy and Barry wants you to forget that, so he's picking on a state where 98% of the country doesn't live, and would never vote for him in 2012 anyway.
Its an easy target....that's all his fragile teleprompter psyche can handle. Obama can't handle the hard stuff, even when the winning choice is clearer than an arm wrestling match between Melissa Etheridge and Harry Reid.
Iran want's nukes, pelicans want clean water, Napolitano and Kagan want to be seen together in public and Arizona just wants to freakin' protect its people. Yet, somehow, he thinks staring down Jan Brewer is going to help him.
He expects us to fall for this distraction trap. It's so like a liberal to believe everyone else thinks like them...
I know one of the perks for Pelosi being speaker is the close calls Biden and this president apparently have...but we voters can walk and chew gum at the same time without almost killing ourselves. So unless Obama is planning a 4 month long tap dance routine on Iran's nukes, this cute little attempt at changing the subject isn't going to make the country forget about the fact that his administration is one big word-that-Biden-says-in-front-of-a-hot-mic-on-national-television up.
I've heard a lot of conservative commentators complain that we shouldn't let this lawsuit distract us from the real issues that highlight the country's Biggest LSER's
achievements. If the numbers are telling the story economists believe they're telling, then the bad economy is sticking around for quite some time yet...sitting front row and center, with a bucket of popcorn, and ready for the greatest show on earth that's set to play in November.
Fighting this idiotic lawsuit on behalf of illegal immigrants isn't a distraction, its just the intermission.Add a comment
When you think things couldn't possibly get dumberer (its a word...when playing Scrabble with Biden...) with the Obama Administration, check out NASA Administrator Charles Bolden's attempt to employ the comedy's classic rule of three with Al Jazeera...
The FOREMOST item on NASA's agenda is to "reach out to the Muslim world?!?" to help them "feel good..."
Either somebody needs to get our president a cigarette, because he MUST be suffering from nicotine withdrawal, or Obama is bored with being president and now wants to be an Asstronaut.
I thought that NASA's agenda was to explore outer space! Not come up with a political policy that belongs there.
Unless I didn't dig deep enough, I'm totally unaware of a single nation in the Muslim world that has any space program to speak of. Russia and Japan, mentioned by Boden, do have their own programs. So other than experimenting on the effects zero gravity has on sand, car bombs, and mercy killings, what scientific contributions can the Muslim world seriously offer to any space program?
In other news, college students writing their thesis for a Masters Degree will now be required to reach out to the Kindergarten world for contributions in an effort to make them feel good about learning their ABC's.
Is this yet another example of what change looks like?
Would it really kill Hollywood to return to making movies with positive and (gasp) patriotic overtones? Nobody watches the anti-war, America bashing garbage they put out anyway.
The first and only movie they're going to slip past me is
Crapitar Avatar. Which by far is the most OVERRATED movie of all time, and that's without the Bush bashing anti-war undertones. I firmly believe that if we actually knew the plot of that flick, and didn't hear so much about how awesome the 3D technology was going to be, then most of us would've never given it the time of day. In the end we would've seen that instead of it being the highest grossing movie of all time it would've been more like James Cameron's sequel to Titanic.
Now, I have to confess I'm no connoisseur of old movies, and I'm starting to wonder why not. Thankfully my brother is, and he sent me this.
Happy July 4th...again!
:-DAdd a comment
I was at the beach with my wife yesterday, and at beginning of the pier at the beach stands a flag pole, and the American flag was waving in the wind.
I did what happens to me almost ever time I see our flag wave...I stared at it, and for the moment I was watching it the rest of the world didn't exist. I become totally lost in the beauty of its waving, and all of the significance that flag carries. I think about how awesome our country is, and how much pride I have inside of myself to be an American. That happens almost every time I see our flag wave. We are so blessed.
I also get sad that there are actually others out there who don't feel the same way, and that waving the flag is just so bourgeois, and that statements like this...
...sound more like the ravings of the superstitious than the acknowledgement of Truth required to keep this country as great as it is.
I want to say that our complacency with freedom makes such seeming contempt inevitable, but I can't believe it. Since the beginning of the American journey the wind of God's power and greatness has been at our back, and it continues to blow only so long as we know he's there. I know it's not easy, but not only do we have to continue to pray for God's blessing on our nation, we have to start encouraging each other to do so as well.
We are great because we asked God to make us great. If we lose that greatness there will be no other way to get it back except through Him.
When I pray for our country I pray that we never forget this Truth. I especially pray that our leaders remember it, and that those who have forgotten it will someday come to know it again.
May God Bless America, and may we continue to actively seek that blessing.
Happy Independence Day!Add a comment
iOwnTheWorld.com is on The List, and it's AWESOME, and if you haven't seen it yet go there now, don't walk, run. They do a lot of the same things I do, but better and more often. Definitely one of my most favorite blogs.
If you don't know Walter, then the video below is your chance to meet him!
Add a comment
When is any Democrat going to finally come forward and be embarrassed for Punchline Pelosi?
This little diatribe of her's reminded me of a story I received in my email a few months ago that I think explains perfectly why Nancy Pelosi has to be the stupidest politician to rise to such a high position of power in my life time.
With Pelosi there is truly no there, there. I've said this before and I'll say it again...Is it November yet?Add a comment
Senator Lindsey Graham of South Carolina has come to find himself in hot water with conservatives over the years for acting like a RINO. I'm willing to cut him some slack, can you blame a dude named Lindsey for being confused on what to think about anything?
Now, according to Politico,
she he sHe thinks the Tea Party will die out because it lacks vision.
The last time I checked the Tea Party stood for lower taxation, a modicum of sanity brought to fiscal policy, and Snapple over Lipton's Brisk.
All of that was off the top of my head, BEFORE reading their Contract From America.
If you read the contract you'd be left wondering if Graham says it is "lacking vision" because he thinks the Tea Party is a club for blind Republicans.
The contract has tons of vision!
I don't begrudge his desire to be a voice of moderation in the GOP, and neither apparently does South Carolina, because every band of merry men needs at least one wiener that always wimps out when mischief is afoot, and its just better for all to let them be the lookout. However, he should at least TRY to heed the words of his base of support.
Of course, THAT wasn't even the worst part, here's where the doozy of the entire article come in:
If that was true then why does Reagan continue to be the litmus test against which all other Republicans running for office are measured? And why doesn't he want to put any of the onus on the Democrats to unite on the issues?
As if Obama coming from the Senate wasn't example enough, its just like a senator such as Graham to show the country how members of Congress, for the most part, don't understand what real leadership is.
Starting from the conviction of compromise and not principle is exactly the kind of attitude that will drive the GOP to irrelevancy...there has to be a clear choice, you don't win over Democrats who aren't liberally inclined by being a "lighter" version of their crazies. You present a choice and then you make the case for your position.
Don't get me wrong, I get it with Lindsey, if my name was Nancy, or Elena, or Girl.....or Mangina, and the majority of people who vote for me want lower taxes, no amnesty, and a muzzle on global warming crazies, and I vote the opposite way of all of those things....I, frankly, would expect voters to understand too.
So the moral of the story is: Next time they vote for a man they should make sure "he" actually has a pair.Add a comment
Fox News has a slideshow of OLD ads that would NEVER be allowed to see the light of day in modern times. One of the more egregious examples is below. I started thinking...there is a way we could get this ad to be deemed acceptalbe by liberals and their media lapdogs...so click on the "New PC version" to see what I mean...
Add a comment
Click the image above to see a larger version.Add a comment
Hey, I'm not the one who keeps saying we need to remake America, I'm just feeding President Obama a suggestion here...(a big thanks to Chlorinated Liberty for the idea)
Click to see a larger version
Found this video posted at All American Blogger, who also claims credit for creating the video. This is an excellent collection of Democrat wisdom that speaks for itself.
I want to add my two cents to this, but I'm not really sure how in a way that makes this video better, but I'll give it a shot...
Its becoming increasingly apparent to those of us who are actually paying attention that the real values of the Democratic party, at its core, have departed from anything that resembles the principles we were actually founded on.
When a Democrat says something is "un-American" try to take note on if they say HOW its "un-American." They can't say how, because they're so wrapped up in themselves they don't even know what "American" is anymore.
Or maybe I'm not giving them enough credit, after all, President Obama has been saying since his 2008 victory speech that he wants to "REMAKE" America, so maybe its that they all have God complexes and "un-American" is anything that isn't in THEIR image....
Don't take my word for it, the morons in the video make my point for me.Add a comment
I tell ya...sometimes liberals write the material for me and make my job way too easy...Especially with any debate to be had on non-debatable issues such as the allowance of illegal immigration.
Nothing more easily put truth to the lie of this notion that liberalism is the intellectually superior ideology (that they push on the world) than to hear the kind of grasping at straws reasoning for why we should allow such things.
Listen to this latest excuse from Milwaukee County Supervisor Peggy West, a Democrat, as she describes why she opposes Arizona's SB1070 and supports a boycott of the state...
Wow...Why can't these people just be honest and say they want illegals to be allowed to vote for them?
I think this can be counted as reason number infinity as to why liberals shouldn't be in charge of stuff, like, ever again. If a basic geographical understanding that Arizona is a border state then how is she going to begin to grasp relevant fiscal issues such as taxation and its effects on an economy?
Maybe she meant boarder...as in surf boarder...and the surf of any body of water is certainly "a ways removed" from the border of Arizona.
Oh...and how about the guy that corrected her? How unnecessarily polite was he? If there is ever a time to break decorum and just go off on a moron that was it.
It has never been said that conservatives are the kind of useful idiots Lenin spoke of, which may be why there is such a concerted effort to edge them out of education by people who would rather have someone like him in charge. I also think "Peggy" is probably not the best name for such an idiotic woman, she probably forgets all the time whether she's a one "g" or two "g" type of
Harry Reid is poised to become part of an elite club of majority leaders who managed to not win reelection. So Rory Reid must be really stoked that his father's approval ratings stink like Limburger cheese, stuffed with poop, and dunked in skunk sauce AT THE SAME TIME that HE wants to be governor of Nevada.
Here is his campaign logo....
Did I say that IS his logo? I meant to say it WAS...take a look at the video to see what I mean.
He removed his last name! He wants to be known as only Rory...which I didn't even know that was a real name until I met Rory Gilmore, the younger half of the Gilmore Girls. So imagine my confusion when I heard Rory was Harry's son!
(I never watched Gilmore Girls, but having a wife keeps me current with TV shows for chicks)
And whats up with the replacing of the "O" in his name with that little logo of his? I mean...WH DES THAT?
This isn't an isolated incident either, judging by the masthead of his website this one name thing is official.
So here's the challenge of the day, count how many times "Reid" comes up on his bio page.
Seriously?!? Who is this guy trying to fool?
If you didn't tell me they were father and son I would've guessed they were the Olsen twins of politics.
I'd love to ask why he wants to go with only one name, but I'm afraid I would just get some diatribe about how he wants to follow in the footsteps of idols like Prince, or Madonna, or...........
I don't know, maybe I'm just reading the masthead wrong and he legally changed his name to "2010."
Ok, ok, I'm not a Nevada resident and I don't really know the guy, but I think the above ad tells me all I need to know about Rory Reid.
I'm loathe to ever advocate for anything that stifles free speech, but maybe its time to pass a law that flat out prohibits the use of children in political ads.
The first guy that thought to do that was probably a genius, but if I run for office and my campaign consultant tells me I need to have an ad where kids are force to take time out of screwing up their times tables to lecture adults on who they should vote for, and then pretend the script they read from was their own words, I'd can that hack so fast he'd think he was a general in Afghanistan bitching about the wimpy idiot of a president he has to answer to.
This is why it's good Nevada finally gets it about Harry Reid, because based on that commercial for Rory Reid I'm willing to bet the apple doesn't fall far from the tree (for a more accurate description hold your tongue when you say "apple").Add a comment
I received this story in a email and it made me really laugh so I had to share...
A Republican, in a wheelchair, entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?"
The waitress nodded "yes," so the Republican requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.
The next patron to come in was a Libertarian, with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus, over there?"
The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."
The third patron to come into the restaurant was a Democrat on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there honey! How's about gettin' me a cold mug of Miller Light?" He too looked across the restaurant and asked, "Isn't that God's boy over there?
The waitress nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold beer. "On my bill," he said loudly.
As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength come back into his legs, got up, and danced a jig out the door.
Jesus passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Libertarian felt his back straightening up and he raised his hands, praised the Lord, and did a series of back flips out the door.
Then, Jesus walked towards the Democrat, just smiling.
The Democrat jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me ... I'm collecting disability."Add a comment
It's maybe a little soon for this one, but My last top 10 list was very well received I got amped up to make another one. Now that we have many of the primaries out of the way and the election landscape is taking shape, I wanted to help set the tone for it.
Everyone knows how this works, if I missed any good ones let me know by commenting below!
10. Vote Democrat, dozens of MSNBC viewers can’t be wrong.
9. Betting all of your money on red, so we can drown in ink that's red, brought to you by laws that we've never even read.
8. Hey! Lets cap and trade the constitution!
7. But OPEC said the oil spill was our chance to spread the wealth.
6. When Obama screws up...the only thing we have to fear is beer itself.
5. Obama's birth certificate is as real as the cash he used to buy it.
4. If you bash Bush long enough Barney Frank will ask you out.
3. ObamaCare…This is what derange looks like.
2. (To the tune of Naughty By Nature’s “O.P.P.”) You know the G.O.P. can’t outspend me.
1. Hope and Change, you can be leavin’